"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of things unseen." Hebrews 11:1
Hope is a dear friend of mine. Someone who, first, sat with me during some of the darkest days of my childhood. In those days, I thought for sure I was all alone. I thought I was useless, broken. Hope reminded me that the Lord promised to never leave us or forsake us. Hope told me that not only was the Lord WITH me, but He had a huge plan for my future. Even as a child, I was thankful for those reminders.
I clung to those promises day after lonely day until the first time I actually FELT His presence. The warmth of His arms around me brought a peace to my heart that I can never adequately express. The coolness of His Spirit in my room that day renewed me & filled me until I could no longer contain the joy of His presence any more. I couldn't wait to share with Hope that it finally happened. He FINALLY came! Hope was not surprised, but was certainly thrilled that I had truly found the only One who could pour enough of Himself into me to fill all those broken places within. Hope & I shared together the joy from those moments I had experienced with my Savior. Hope reminded me that this would not be the only time I would ever need to come to Him; but that even when darker days would come, He would always be right there.
Hope was right. I never was alone. I grew up knowing Hope, but more importantly, knowing the One who brought Hope into my life in the first place. Sure, there were more difficult days to come, but Hope ALWAYS reminded me of that first significant encounter with the One I needed most. Hope never let me forget my need for more days like that. Hope was what carried me through the hollow numbness following the deaths of our unborn children. Hope celebrated with my husband & I when we finally looked into the perfect little face of our firstborn son. Hope carried me through little things like sleepless nights & laundry woes and Hope carried me through bigger things like schooling, job changes, & the life altering decision to do foster care & adoption.
I have to say that there have definitely been days over the years when I honestly couldn't FEEL the Lord in the room with me, but Hope has been faithful to remind me that He was there. By experience, I know I can trust Hope. I have never actually SEEN Hope, but Hope has never disappointed me in the past & I have no reason to believe that Hope will disappoint me in the future.
"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character; & character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us." Romans 5:1-5
My Family
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Wednesday, March 25, 2015
Glass Houses
They say, "people who live in glass houses, shouldn't throw stones." That's probably true to an extent. However, I would say that people who truly live in "glass houses" actually have the least to lose if stones are thrown. In addition to that, I would say that those who truly live in "glass houses" will likely be the LAST to throw stones. They know the risks. It seems to me that people who truly live in "glass houses" are people who are transparent--authentic. Authentic people are already "out there" so-to-speak, for others to see. Not to be put on a pedestal, or to be viewed for "viewing's sake" but to be REAL. In my opinion, it seems that being REAL with others does much more in the long run when it comes to building lasting relationships & even building the Kingdom, than hiding behind walls will EVER do.
People who build walls are fragile, yet proud & are typically the 1st to fire stones at others. It's SAFER behind a wall. No one can see you. No one can reach you. No one can hurt you. You can put in a window or a door & have control over who sees what, when it comes to the real you. You can easily see the weaknesses in those who are transparent, while keeping your own frailties hidden. The problem with walls, is that you're alone inside them. Even if one or two people are sitting in there with you, you're really never able to become comfortable with who you are. Why?--Because whatever we think we have to protect ourselves from never goes away as long as the walls are there. What we don't realize while we're sitting inside our thick, carefully constructed walls, is that the enemy we perceive to be lurking on the other side of those walls, is really inside our own heads. In effort to keep the enemy on the outside, we're really locking him right in there with us. Taunting us. Lying to us. Keeping us captive.
Freedom only comes when we open ourselves up to the world around us. Once the walls begin to fall, you feel exposed at first. It's risky. It's scary. BUT, once the walls come down, you're finally free. Free from bondage. Free to move about. Free to BE. I don't believe God ever intended that we lock ourselves behind walls. We don't need manmade layers of protection. We only NEED the protection of the Father. The One whose wings, span our every worry & cover our every fear.
With this new freedom comes responsibility. We're not free to spat off every annoyance & every critical suggestion we feel we have earned the right to. We ARE free, however, to extend the grace & mercy we have found towards others who might be desperately seeking it. We are free to help others climb out from behind their own self-constructed walls & into the abundant freedom we now enjoy. We are free from shame. Free from fear. Free with our time. Free with our will. Free with our love.
It's not until darkness is exposed, that it can be destroyed by the light. Don't just open the door & let the light shine in. Allow God to destroy the walls & then be FILLED with His light.
"Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works & praise your Father in Heaven..." Matthew 5:16
People who build walls are fragile, yet proud & are typically the 1st to fire stones at others. It's SAFER behind a wall. No one can see you. No one can reach you. No one can hurt you. You can put in a window or a door & have control over who sees what, when it comes to the real you. You can easily see the weaknesses in those who are transparent, while keeping your own frailties hidden. The problem with walls, is that you're alone inside them. Even if one or two people are sitting in there with you, you're really never able to become comfortable with who you are. Why?--Because whatever we think we have to protect ourselves from never goes away as long as the walls are there. What we don't realize while we're sitting inside our thick, carefully constructed walls, is that the enemy we perceive to be lurking on the other side of those walls, is really inside our own heads. In effort to keep the enemy on the outside, we're really locking him right in there with us. Taunting us. Lying to us. Keeping us captive.
Freedom only comes when we open ourselves up to the world around us. Once the walls begin to fall, you feel exposed at first. It's risky. It's scary. BUT, once the walls come down, you're finally free. Free from bondage. Free to move about. Free to BE. I don't believe God ever intended that we lock ourselves behind walls. We don't need manmade layers of protection. We only NEED the protection of the Father. The One whose wings, span our every worry & cover our every fear.
With this new freedom comes responsibility. We're not free to spat off every annoyance & every critical suggestion we feel we have earned the right to. We ARE free, however, to extend the grace & mercy we have found towards others who might be desperately seeking it. We are free to help others climb out from behind their own self-constructed walls & into the abundant freedom we now enjoy. We are free from shame. Free from fear. Free with our time. Free with our will. Free with our love.
It's not until darkness is exposed, that it can be destroyed by the light. Don't just open the door & let the light shine in. Allow God to destroy the walls & then be FILLED with His light.
"Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works & praise your Father in Heaven..." Matthew 5:16
Thursday, March 19, 2015
An Encounter that Heals
Healing is a funny thing. Sometimes it happens instantaneously. Sometimes it happens slowly over time. Other times, it seems as though it never comes. I know of some people right now who are praying for physical healing. Physical healing is something that's usually visible and measurable. Physical healing is often achievable via medical means--not always, but sometimes. I pray for my friends who have physical needs because I know the needs are there. In some cases, they're obvious because of a visible sign or perhaps a hospitalization or appointments with a physician. Not only do we know TO pray for physical needs, but we usually know HOW to pray for physical needs. If there's pain, we ask the Lord to take it away. If there's a lack of function of an organ, we ask the Lord to correct the situation or at least enable the doctors to correctly diagnose the problem & work towards a solution.
I my own life, I have experienced physical healing & will never forget the joy that it brought when I realized God had performed a medical miracle. After the birth of our 2nd biological daughter, I experienced immense lower back pain, which an MRI showed was the result of 1 bulging & 1 crushed disk in my vertebrae. The next step was surgery. Following a prayer & anointing, however, I felt my pain gradually disappear. A 2nd MRI confirmed that the discs "repaired themselves" which I knew meant that the Lord had done a work in my body. Of course, I praised Him & we shared our miracle with as many people as we could. There was no social media at the time, so it was limited to just people I could physically see or telephone the "old fashioned" way. Nevertheless, we celebrated that healing in every way that was available to us at the time.
As much joy as that healing brought to me, there has been a MUCH greater, more significant healing within me which has taken years for the Lord to perform. The Lord has healed me to the point that I am not even a recognizable version of the girl I used to be. As a child, I was broken. Circumstances beyond my control altered me in such a way that I was forced to take every measure possible to shield myself from further hurt. I lived my childhood & teen years surrounded by a protective covering of laughter & activity, never truly opening myself up to anyone. I never truly felt "safe" anywhere. I never truly experienced "trust" with another human. I never felt "worthy" of anything good & I certainly never saw myself as having any real "value" to anyone other than my parents.
Not even really knowing that I was broken, I didn't actually seek after healing, per se, but rescue. In my seeking for rescue, I found the One I knew held my solution in the palm of His hands. Hour after hour, night after night, I spent listening to music & just being held by my Savior. There are people who claim that the Holy Spirit is imaginary, but once you find yourself physically held by Him, there will never be a shred of doubt in your mind that He's absolutely real.
Heading into college, I had an assurance that the Lord would take care of me, regardless of the fact that my family could not support me financially. I knew because that same One who held me all those years was speaking to me & giving me the courage to do something that I never would have done on my own. In college, I had countless decisions to make regarding my future. A future I only wanted to spend with the One who held me. For the first time, He brought me to a place where I could finally be "real" with someone. He enabled me to open up for the first time about my brokenness. These people held me up in prayer & I will forever be thankful for their friendship at such a critical period of my life.
Today, I can tell you that I have been healed. I am whole. I cannot point to a scar & tell you HOW God did whatever He did, but I can tell you with unspeakable JOY, that it happened. I can also tell you that He does this kind of thing ALL THE TIME. It's kind of His specialty. Just ask the Woman at the Well. She had wounds within her that she couldn't even put her finger on, but Jesus could. He not only put His finger on them, but He HEALED them. She left the well that day one hundred percent different from the way she came.
I say all that to say this: You or I never know what someone is carrying around within them. Behind that smile & those sparkly eyes may be someone with brokenness who desperately needs an encounter with the One who can bring healing to their soul. You could be the one the Lord uses to bring Himself to those who need Him most. Listen more than you speak. Love more than you correct. Learn more than you teach.
If you're that one who's still carrying around your hurt & brokenness, I can tell you that life on the other side of that is SO MUCH better than holding onto it. Open yourself up to an encounter that will bring you healing. There's so much freedom once you do.
I my own life, I have experienced physical healing & will never forget the joy that it brought when I realized God had performed a medical miracle. After the birth of our 2nd biological daughter, I experienced immense lower back pain, which an MRI showed was the result of 1 bulging & 1 crushed disk in my vertebrae. The next step was surgery. Following a prayer & anointing, however, I felt my pain gradually disappear. A 2nd MRI confirmed that the discs "repaired themselves" which I knew meant that the Lord had done a work in my body. Of course, I praised Him & we shared our miracle with as many people as we could. There was no social media at the time, so it was limited to just people I could physically see or telephone the "old fashioned" way. Nevertheless, we celebrated that healing in every way that was available to us at the time.
As much joy as that healing brought to me, there has been a MUCH greater, more significant healing within me which has taken years for the Lord to perform. The Lord has healed me to the point that I am not even a recognizable version of the girl I used to be. As a child, I was broken. Circumstances beyond my control altered me in such a way that I was forced to take every measure possible to shield myself from further hurt. I lived my childhood & teen years surrounded by a protective covering of laughter & activity, never truly opening myself up to anyone. I never truly felt "safe" anywhere. I never truly experienced "trust" with another human. I never felt "worthy" of anything good & I certainly never saw myself as having any real "value" to anyone other than my parents.
Not even really knowing that I was broken, I didn't actually seek after healing, per se, but rescue. In my seeking for rescue, I found the One I knew held my solution in the palm of His hands. Hour after hour, night after night, I spent listening to music & just being held by my Savior. There are people who claim that the Holy Spirit is imaginary, but once you find yourself physically held by Him, there will never be a shred of doubt in your mind that He's absolutely real.
Heading into college, I had an assurance that the Lord would take care of me, regardless of the fact that my family could not support me financially. I knew because that same One who held me all those years was speaking to me & giving me the courage to do something that I never would have done on my own. In college, I had countless decisions to make regarding my future. A future I only wanted to spend with the One who held me. For the first time, He brought me to a place where I could finally be "real" with someone. He enabled me to open up for the first time about my brokenness. These people held me up in prayer & I will forever be thankful for their friendship at such a critical period of my life.
Today, I can tell you that I have been healed. I am whole. I cannot point to a scar & tell you HOW God did whatever He did, but I can tell you with unspeakable JOY, that it happened. I can also tell you that He does this kind of thing ALL THE TIME. It's kind of His specialty. Just ask the Woman at the Well. She had wounds within her that she couldn't even put her finger on, but Jesus could. He not only put His finger on them, but He HEALED them. She left the well that day one hundred percent different from the way she came.
I say all that to say this: You or I never know what someone is carrying around within them. Behind that smile & those sparkly eyes may be someone with brokenness who desperately needs an encounter with the One who can bring healing to their soul. You could be the one the Lord uses to bring Himself to those who need Him most. Listen more than you speak. Love more than you correct. Learn more than you teach.
If you're that one who's still carrying around your hurt & brokenness, I can tell you that life on the other side of that is SO MUCH better than holding onto it. Open yourself up to an encounter that will bring you healing. There's so much freedom once you do.
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